The Bill Swerski Superfan Award
This season the person who has the best all around performance each week will be selected as the receipient of the "Bill Swerski Superfan Award Winner". This award will be selected on a weekly basis by a discussion and vote on this very blog. The winner will have their choice of seat for the next Sunday and a tie-breaking vote for television-game assignments should, unless such a vote goes in favor of the Redskins.
What are we looking for in the "Bill Swerski Superfan Award Winner" are you wondering? Funny you should ask. This individual will display supreme proficiency in the following:
-Showing up at kickoff and staying for all or most of the football games of the day
-Providing great intensity and enthusiasm. Motivating others to do the same.
-Enhancing the Football IQ's of everyone at the Football Sunday with groundbreaking insight and knowledge of all assets of football (similar to that of a version of John Clayton who didn't get wedgied everyday in high school)
-Wearing original and dynamic football watching gear - please note that outifts found to be particuarly outside the box will get a proverbial leg-up on the competition right off the bat
-Contributing to the attitude and tone of the room by asking such questions as "who would you rather share a porta-john with for 13 straight hours - Mrs. B, Tuti, and Natalie from the Facts of Life or the cast of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy?"
You catch our drift.
Apparantly we are not the only ones excited about this award. Two sisters (below - and, yes that is her underwear on the left) have volunteered their services to the lucky winner of the "Bill Swerski Superfan Award" and will reportedly perform the "Double Reverse Cowgirl" (think about it - draw a picture if you have to) on the weekly winner.
posted by Pete Stickle at 5:35 PM
3 Comments:
An early vote of confidence has to go to Mr. Davey. That guy seemed to be everywhere, yet nowhere, all at once.
3:50 PM
"Give me your hungry, your thirsty, your Dustin's Sisters, yearning to be free." Emma Lazarus, American Poet, once penned a similar phrase describing the open arms of America. I see a great parallel between Football Sunday and Lazarus' America. With that in mind, it is a great honor to be the Inuagural Winner of the Bill Swersky Award. This is my Heisman--I take great pride in rooting for the SKINS and using it as an excuse to drink heavily for(at least) the next 16 Sundays. I, however, could not have won this award if it weren't for the support given to me by teammates, Wojo, Dustin, and Bucktown's Kielbasa souffle, you guys are the best. In closing, I'd like to remind everyone attending Football Sundays, although you might not be Swerzky's, you are Superfans nonetheless.
11:56 AM
I'd like to congratulate Carr on his achievement. I welcome you to this exclusive "fraternity." Be weary my friend, the Quest for the Swerski can corrupt even the loyalist of allies. Your contributions will be scoffed at, your every move attacked, your comments ignored, and your drinking srutinized. Have fun walking around with that bullseye on your back.
1:51 PM
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